Growing Roots

It has long been told to me that when you uproot your life to a new place, especially a new state, it takes about a year to finally begin to grow roots in that new location.

I thought maybe my transition to Colorado would be a little quicker than a year because I had so many friends here prior to moving, and I knew enough about Denver and Colorado itself, that the growing roots part would just magically happen, and I’d be here with my life on track in no time.

That’s not quite what happened…

In fact, there were quite a few times where I felt completely and utterly uprooted, unable to found solid ground to even think that at any given point, roots were possible to grow! I spent many long, consuming hours testing waters, trying out new ways of being and growing into a life here.

Yet, I continued to struggle.

I struggled to figure out what job I wanted to get. I struggled to figure out where I wanted to live. I struggled to decide if this was even the place I should  be living. I struggled with knowing who to trust. I struggled with knowing how to fit certain people into my life. I struggled with letting go of the idea that family isn’t necessarily defined by blood. I struggled with deciding who was my family and who wasn’t. I struggled. Period.

Questions streamed through my uprooted brain daily: Did I make the right decision to move across country? Was it the right thing to leave the classroom? I love my friends here and my spiritual community, but is that enough reason to stay? What am I supposed to be doing with my life? Are the mountains better than the ocean?

For some of these questions, I knew the answer was a resounding “YES!”, but I still questioned whether or not this was a place I could grow roots.

It wasn’t until I moved into my current living situation that I could finally start to see the potential in starting a life here. Moving in to our house and having really amazing roommates gave me a new perspective – this was my space that I chose, that I wanted, that I loved. And I got to make it my own.

At that time, things really started to shift.

I found myself not questioning IF I was supposed to be in Colorado, but rather HOW I wanted to be in Colorado.

WOW! What a difference that perspective took my life from uprooted to finding ground.

And what happened over the next few months was truly unexpected.

I realized my full potential as an educator and consciously chose to apply to schools in the Denver area. I honestly thought I was done in the classroom for good. I was convinced of it, but really all I needed was time and a bit of perspective to find balance in myself and what I truly wanted.

It was the absolute right decision because not only did I feel it in my bones, but I was offered multiple jobs – some of which called me within the same hour to offer me a teaching position. Of course I accepted the one I truly knew I wanted! And couldn’t be happier about the decision!

If that doesn’t say right direction, I don’t know what does!

I have found myself feeling more in the flow of life, and much less affected by unexpected disruptions than I used to be, because I have come to a place where I know all that is happening is for the best for me and all of those involved.

And for the first time EVER, I chose and joined a spiritual community! Growing up, we went to whatever religious place our families went to, but this time, I got to choose, and I’m so excited because the community I belong to is open to all walks of life, and is diverse in its spiritual mentality. I have truly been searching for a spiritual community like this one where being involved includes feeling welcomed for who you are, where you are in life, and how you choose to live. I’ve never felt that kind of openness before, and they speak my spiritual language, to boot. But the best part of all is that I’ve grown so much as an individual because of them, and have become solid in the foundation of my personal being that this was an easy decision to become a member of something I truly believe in.

Like I said, the few months following my move into my home was life-shifting. Now with just days before my 1-year anniversary, I can’t even believe who I was a year ago and how I was so uncertain of how this was all going to play out. I also see why I had to go through all of the shifts, questioning, challenges, and realignment, because if I hadn’t then I couldn’t show up as authentically as I can today.

I’m certainly a better version of me than I was even a few months ago; I’m solid in who I am and what I want; I don’t have time to pacify those who expect me to be someone I’m not.

Despite all of the unexpected shifts, twists and turns, I have found balance, love, and happiness. But most of all I have started growing roots.

And so I grow roots...

And so I grow roots…

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